Kramer Defeats RealNetworks Computer to Win 10K
News Release (November 17, 2006)
Joe Gaspard
Seattle, Washington Jim Kramer, isolated in a soundproof booth, defeated a RealNetworks computer, winning $10,000. In addition to programming RealNetworks to sim Scrabble positions, the technicians had also added a "Trash talk" feature, as Jim was about to discover ...
Jim_Kramer: ABIORTW Let's have a good game 8G BOW +16 16 RealNetworks: GGOPRRY Hello Professor. Would you like to play a game? Exchange: GGOPR +0 0 Jim_Kramer: AAEIORT Must have been a tough rack! G7 OBIA +8 24 RealNetworks: AELNPRS Yeah, another tough one here. J2 PLANERS +76 76 Jim_Kramer: AEIMNRT I see. 4F ANIMATER +72 96 RealNetworks (sarcastically): Oh, nice find, genius F9 OH +28 104 Jim_Kramer: ABCDEIT I need to ask the director a question regarding taunting. Please release the pod's latch H10 DACITE +43 139 RealNetworks: Grow up you baby. Just play. 3H PULE +18 122 Jim_Kramer: ??ABETZ Open the pod bay doors, please, Real 13C BoTAnIZE +104 243 RealNetworks: ADEENOS Lord, you have enough stinking blanks there!! HOG!!! I hope you have to go to the bathroom. The door stays LOCKED! Take this! M4 REASONED +61 183 Jim_Kramer: AALNOTY 14D NAY +30 273 RealNetworks: Oh, not talking now? LOL! You have bits of your lunch in your beard, professor! 8L KOAN +39 222 Jim_Kramer: AEELLOT 15A ALOE +18 291 RealNetworks: DEIORSS Here I come, geek breath! O3 SORDINES +60 282 Jim_Kramer: EGHILTT 14J LIGHT +26 317 RealNetworks: And I am in the lead now!!! Neener neener! FLUX 5E FLUX +44 326 Jim_Kramer: DEIQTUU 10J QUIETS +37 354 RealNetworks: Both blanks, the Q and the Z? And all I had was the X, this J, and all the S's!!! Not fair!! JO E11 JOTA +22 348 Jim_Kramer: DEMRTUV L12 VUG +14 368 RealNetworks: That's more like it! VU! Must be an ugly rack. You'll be no match for my endgame! Here's a word that reminds me of your mother! 12D COW +35 383 Jim_Kramer: DEEMRRT Sim this, asshole! K1 MEETER +26 394 RealNetworks: One in the bag. One in the bag. What is it? Click Click Click. Must go out in two. How can I? I don't know what the last friggin' letter is! Danger, Will Robinson! Danger! Danger! What? Where the hell did that come from! 1K MOVER +33 416 Jim_Kramer: DGIIRTY 3B RIGID +18 412 RealNetworks: Oh, shit. This does not look good. 11H AGIN +25 441 Jim_Kramer: TY M13 THY +22 434 +8 from opponents rack (F) 442 Jim_Kramer: Good game. RealNetworks: A strange game. The only winning move is not to play. No, wait, that's not right. How about a nice game of chess?